Random Insanity Karaoke Bar: Gundam Wing
by Karaoke Gurl
Summary: This is the first story in a hopefully large RIKB series. This is the yaoi version (1x2, 3x4, 5xD). I will make a non-yaoi version too. pg-13 for swearing, drugs, fights and some sexual content.
1. Enter the RIKB!!!

Disclaimer: I don't own GW. I only own the bar (which only exists in the downtown, back-alley, red-light district of cyberspace), myself, and Eddie (actually he's my dead brother and besides his girlfriend, i own him more than anyone else). Occasionally my friends Raven, Krysten and Kimmie are here (actually they never leave) and they own themselves. I also don't own any songs. And don't flame if i totally screw-over or bash one of your favorite characters, i bash my own faves too!!! Now, on to the story!!!  
  
The Random Insanity Karaoke Bar (RIKB) Featuring: Gundam Wing *yaoi version*  
  
Heero Yuy, Duo Maxwell, Trowa Barton, Quatre Raberba Winner, Wufei Chang, Hilde Schiebacker, Relena Peacecrap (author grins evilly), Dorothy Catalonia, Catherine Bloom and sally Po walked through the dark and somewhat deserted streets of M-13666 (my own made-up colony!!! just what i always wanted!!!).  
  
Duo: I'M HUNGRY!!!  
  
Hilde: DAMMIT, MAXWELL, YOU'RE ALWAYS HUNGRY!!!  
  
Duo: AM NOT!!!  
  
Hilde: ARE TOO!!!  
  
Duo: AM NOT!!!  
  
Hilde *pulls out a big-ass machine gun from Shinigami-knows-where and points it at Duo's head* : ARE TOO!!!  
  
Relena: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Pacifism is the way!!!  
  
Dorothy *punches Relena in the face, leaving a pretty purple shiner!!!*  
  
Duo: OKAY, OKAY, SO WHAT IF I AM!?!  
  
Hilde *puts gun away and smiles angelicly (yeah, right)* : Oh, no reason I just wanted to be right again.  
  
Then it started to rain. All that was to be seen were old empty warehouses. It seemed no one lived there. Then Quatre spotted a quaint little karaoke bar that allowed underage drinking.  
  
Quatre: I spot a quaint little karaoke bar that allows underage drinking!!!  
  
Duo, Heero, Dorothy, Trowa, Wufei & Hilde: BEER!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Catherine: *gasp* Trowa, you know you shouldn't drink!!!  
  
Trowa *mutters something that sounds like "Shove it, bitch."*  
  
*Meanwhile inside the Quaint little Karaoke Bar (RIKB)*  
  
Meg-chan (me) is seen banging her head on the nearest wall.  
  
Kim-chan (Kimmie): Dammit Meg, stop banging you're head on the fucking wall!!!  
  
Rave (Raven): How rude!  
  
Kris (Krysten) comes through the door on crutches with a full-leg cast on her left leg.  
  
Kris: My leg hurts!  
  
Eddie comes down the stairs (me and him live upstairs, he's my brother) with his hair messed up and his shirt unbuttoned and hanging open.  
  
Eddie: 'Sup sis? Kim? Kris?  
  
Meg continues to bang her head on the wall, Kim looks at the steak knife silverware bin with an evil smile and Krys says: My leg hurts!!! Rave gives Eddie a look that says "I KNOW you see me!!!" Eddie walks over to Rave, picks her up, sits down in her seat and sets her in his lap. They proceed to make out on the barstool seat. Then, the door swung open. Five guys and five girls stood inside the doorway, soaking wet.  
  
Kris *whispers* : Customers! Are they really real!?!  
  
Kim walks up to one of the boys (Wufei) and pokes him.  
  
Wufei *pulls out his katana and points it at Kim* : Touch me again, onna.  
  
Kris *squeaks* : It speaks!!!  
  
Heero: Can we stay here until the rain stops?  
  
Meg *stops banging her head and perks up8 : Ya got money?  
  
Heero: Umm, actually no.  
  
Meg *shrugs* : Oh well, we don't go for money anyways, we go for humiliation!!!  
  
Heero: Hn?  
  
Meg: If ya wanna stay, you all gotta do karaoke!!! If not, I'll throw yer asses out anto the pavement!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!  
  
Heero: Hold on a second.  
  
All the GW peeps huddled together and discussed it. When the huddle broke up, the braided baka (a.k.a. Duo) stepped forward.  
  
Duo: We'll do it as long as we get free food!  
  
Meg *grins evilly* : You want me to cook, and you'll actually eat it?!?  
  
Kim, Rave & Kris: Oh shit...  
  
Meg: Okay!!! Over there, *points to heavy oak trunk* is all the CDs to pick songs from!!! I'll start cooking while you pick out your songs!!!  
  
Heero *glances uneasily at the chest* : Hn.  
  
Trowa: ...  
  
Quatre: Oh, what fun!  
  
Wufei *still pointing his katana at Kim* INJUSTICE!!!  
  
Duo: This is gonna be so cool!  
  
Hilde *thinking out loud* : I shall sing my love to Duo!  
  
Everyone *sweatdrop*  
  
____________________  
  
A/N: So, how is it? Please review! I already have songs for Heero, Relena and Duo, but I'll take suggests for the other characters' songs. BTW, It'll be 1x2, 3x4 & 5xD. 


	2. Heero Sings, Lotsa People Get Drunk And ...

Disclaimer: I don't own GW. I only own the bar (which only exists in the downtown, back-alley, red-light district of cyberspace), myself, and Eddie (actually he's my dead brother and besides his girlfriend, i own him more than anyone else). Occasionally my friends Raven, Krysten and Kimmie are here (actually they never leave) and they own themselves. I also don't own any songs. There's also Drew, Josh and Terrence. They're Kim's, Kris' and my boyfriends, respectively. And don't flame if i totally screw-over or bash one of your favorite characters, i bash my own faves too!!! Now, on to the story!!!  
  
The Random Insanity Karaoke Bar (RIKB) Featuring: Gundam Wing *yaoi version*  
  
Kim and Kris gave themselves, the wild wing boys, Meg, Rave, Eddie, Josh (Josh, Drew and Terrence came downstairs), Drew, Terrence, Hilde and Dorothy drinks as soon as Meg started cooking. Meg had been cooking for about an hour now (and burned five pizzas) so everyone was pretty drunk.  
  
Heero: I'll sing first, and I found the perfect song!  
  
Meg: Okay! I'll set up the mic.  
  
______________________________  
  
Heero *onstage* : This song is for Duo! (Damn Heero's drunk!!!)  
  
*music starts playing*  
  
Heero *singing* : This is what ya do, this is what ya do.  
Ya make me wanna leave the one I'm with, start a new relationship with you,  
This is what ya do.  
You can buy a ring and all the things that come along with it,  
Ya make me, ya make me.  
Ya make me wanna leave the one I'm with, start a new relationship with you,  
This is what ya do.  
You can buy a ring and all the things that come along with it,  
Ya make me, ya make me.  
  
Kris: How come the hot one's are always gay?!?  
  
Josh: Wha?!?  
  
Kris: Nothing!  
  
Heero *singing* : Before anything began between us,  
You were like my best friend.  
The one I used to run and talk to,  
When me and my girl was havin' problems.  
You used to say it'd be okay,  
Suggest little nice things I should do.  
But when I go home at night and lay my head down,  
All I seem to think about was you.  
  
Everyone (except Relena, Sally and Catherine) was so drunk that they actually thought it was romantic. Rave and Eddie started to make out. Wufei and Dorothy *dissappeared* upstairs. Kris tried to kiss Josh but passed out when she was half an inch away.  
  
Heero *singing* : And how you make me wanna,  
Leave the one I'm with,  
Start a new relationship, with you,  
This is what ya do.  
You can buy a ring and all the things that come along with it,  
Ya make me, ya make me.  
Ya make me wanna leave the one I'm with, start a new relationship with you,  
This is what ya do.  
You can buy a ring and all the things that come along with it,  
Ya make me, ya make me.  
  
Duo is just plain confused. He didn't think Heero was gay. Hell, he didn't think he was gay. He slowing started to realize his feelings for Heero,... until Drew brought out the weed. Duo's favorite ways to relieve stress were, 1) Blow something up, 2) Get drunk, or 3) Get high. He was already drunk, but that didn't help, so he grabbed a joint from Drew and lit up.  
  
Heero *singing* : Now what's bad, is you're the one that hooked us up,  
Knowin' it shoulda been you.  
What's sad, is that I love her,  
But I'm falling for you.  
What should I do? Should I,  
Tell my baby bye-bye?  
Should I,  
Do exactly what I feel inside?  
Should I?  
I don't wanna go, don't need to stay,  
But I really need to get it together.  
  
Duo is fully high right now, so nothing is keeping his mind from keeping some *nice* thoughts of Heero out of his head. Kris *finally* regained conciousness.  
  
Kris: My leg hurts!!!  
  
Meg begins to bang her head on the wall again.  
  
Heero *singing* : And how you make me wanna,  
Leave the one I'm with,  
Start a new relationship, with you,  
This is what ya do.  
You can buy a ring and all the things that come along with it,  
Ya make me, ya make me.  
Ya make me wanna leave the one I'm with, start a new relationship with you,  
This is what ya do.  
You can buy a ring and all the things that come along with it,  
Ya make me, ya make me.  
  
Heero *singing* : At this point,  
The situations outta control,  
Never meant to hurt her but I,  
Gotta let her go.  
And as you, may not understand,  
Why all of this is going on,  
I tried, I tried to fight it,  
But the feelings just to strong.  
Ya make me wanna...  
  
Meg: AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! The kitchen's on fire!!!  
  
Kim: I knew we shouldn't have let her cook.  
  
Wufei *who came back from upstairs* : Onnas are supposed to know how to cook and you can't even do that?!?  
  
Kris: Shut your damn mouth, WU-MAN!!!  
  
Wufei: INJUSTICE!!!  
  
Heero jumps off the stage, grabs a fire extinguisher and puts out the fire. Duo glomps him and Relena tries to bash Duo's head in with a wooden spoon.  
  
Relena: Fuck you Duo!!! Hilde's absolutely nuts about you!!! Go glomp her!!! Stay away from my Heero!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!  
  
Rave stops making out with Eddie, grabs a rolling pin and knocks Relena out with it.  
  
Meg, Kim, Kris, Heero, Duo, Quatre, Eddie, Josh, Drew, Terrence, Wufei, Hilde, Sally, Dorothy & Catherine *Blink Blink* : O.O  
  
Trowa *Blink Blink* : ///.O  
  
____________________________  
  
A/N: Please review! Relena sings next! 


	3. Relena In Mourning

Disclaimer: I don't own GW. I only own the bar (which only exists in the downtown, back-alley, red-light district of cyberspace), myself, and Eddie (actually he's my dead brother and besides his girlfriend, i own him more than anyone else). Occasionally my friends Raven, Krysten and Kimmie are here (actually they never leave) and they own themselves. I also don't own any songs. There's also Drew, Josh and Terrence. They're Kim's, Kris' and my boyfriends, respectively. And don't flame if i totally screw-over or bash one of your favorite characters, i bash my own faves too!!! Now, on to the story!!!  
  
The Random Insanity Karaoke Bar (RIKB) Featuring: Gundam Wing *yaoi version  
  
Relena regained conciousness (dammit...) and was crying as she rummaged through the trunk of CDs in search of a song. She pulled out a Roberts Flack CD. She chucked it at Kris, but it hit her cast, ricocheted up and was caught by Meg.  
  
Kris *howling in pain* : INJUSTICE!!!  
  
Wufei *backhands Kris on the back of her head* : Dammit that's MY word!!!  
  
Kris began to scream incoherently about her leg, which everyone ignored. By the way, Duo's still high, and will be for quite a while.  
  
Relena *sniff* : Song number one. *sniff* *sniff*  
  
Meg *looks at song number one* : Awww... I almost feel sorry for her.  
  
Everyone except Trowa and Relena: O.O  
  
Trowa: ///.O  
________________  
  
*music starts*  
  
Relena *singing* : I heard he sang a good song, I heard he had a style  
And so I came to see him to listen for a while  
And there he was this young boy, a stranger to my eyes, he was...  
Strumming my pain with his fingers, singing my life with his words  
Killing me softly with his song, killing me softly with his song  
Telling my whole life with his words, killing me softly with his song  
  
Kris *sniff* *sniff* : That's so bee-yoo-tee-ful! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!  
  
Relena *singing* : I felt all flushed with fever, embarrassed by the crowd  
I felt he found my letters and read each one out loud  
I prayed that he would finish, but he just kept right on...  
Strumming my pain with his fingers, singing my life with his words  
Killing me softly with his song, killing me softly with his song  
Telling my whole life with his words, killing me softly with his song  
  
Kris is still sobbing. Meg starts to bang her head on the wall again. Kim grabs a steak knife (she's fucking obsessed with those knives ain't she?) and chucks it at Kris. It gets lodged in her cast but (suprisingly) doesn't get through to the skin.  
  
Kris *screams* : INJUSTICE!!!  
  
Wufei: THAT'S MY WORD YOU STUPID ONNA!!!  
  
Relena *singing* : He sang as if he knew me in all my dark despair  
And then he looked right through me as if I wasn't there  
But he was there this stranger, singing clear and strong, he was...  
Strumming my pain with his fingers, singing my life with his words  
Killing me softly with his song, killing me softly with his song  
Telling my whole life with his words, killing me softly with his song  
  
Kim : I am so fucking tired of that bitch's damn singing!!!  
  
Kim grabs the knife in Kris's cast, yanks it out and chucks it at Relena, hitting her square in the forehead.  
  
Relena: x.x  
  
Everyone except Trowa and Relena: O.O  
  
Trowa: ///.O  
  
Kris *squeaks* : The bitch is dead!!! YAY!!!  
  
Duo and Kim hold hands and skip around the RIKB singing: Ding, Dong, The bitch is dead, the bitch is dead, the bitch is dead!!!  
______________  
A/N:Relena Peacecrap's dead!!! Sorry all youse Relena fans out there!!! 


	4. Infect Truth: Random Insanity Karaoke Ba...

Disclaimer: I don't own GW. I only own the bar (which only exists in the downtown, back-alley, red-light district of cyberspace), myself, and Eddie (actually he's my dead brother and besides his girlfriend, i own him more than anyone else). Occasionally my friends Raven, Krysten and Kimmie are here (actually they never leave) and they own themselves. I also don't own any songs. There's also Drew, Josh and Terrence. They're Kim's, Kris' and my boyfriends, respectively. And don't flame if i totally screw-over or bash one of your favorite characters, i bash my own faves too!!! Now, on to the story!!!  
  
The Random Insanity Karaoke Bar (RIKB) Featuring: Gundam Wing *yaoi version  
  
Here's a quick recap: Relena's dead, Duo's high, Hilde's psycotic, everyone except Catherine and Sally is drunk, the kitchen is burned down, Duo & Heero are gay, Kris's leg hurts, Kim is obsessed with steak knives, and Duo's singing next.  
  
Duo was digging around inside the trunk and pulled out an Afroman CD. he tossed it to me and walked on stage. Kim, Kris and myself all knew what song he was gonna sing.  
  
*music starts*  
  
Duo *singing* : I was gonna clean my room until I got high  
I gonna get up and find the broom but then I got high  
my room is still messed up and I know why (why man?) yea heyy  
cause I got high  
cause I got high  
cause I got high La da da da da da  
  
Meg: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!  
  
Kim: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!  
  
Kris *squeaks* : hee-hee-hee-hee-hee!!!  
  
Duo *singing* : I was gonna go to class before I got high  
I coulda cheated and I coulda passed but I got high  
(La da da da da da da da da)  
I am taking it next semester and I know why, (why man?) yea heyy  
cause I got high  
cause I got high  
cause I got high La da da da da da  
  
Dorothy: UWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!  
  
Hilde *laughs like Quatre when he went insane in episode twenty sumthin'* heheheheheh...  
  
Duo *singing* : I was gonna go to work but then I got high  
I just got a new promotion but I got high  
now I'm selling dope and I know why (why man?) yea heayy  
cause I got high  
cause I got high  
cause I got high La da da da da da  
  
Catherine *laughs like a Catholic schoolgirl who just heard a dirty joke*  
  
Sally *laughs like a normal, sane person*  
  
Duo *singing* : I was gonna go to court before I got high  
I was gonna pay my child support but then I got high  
they took my whole paycheck and I know why (why man?) yea heayy  
cause I got high  
cause I got high  
cause I got high La da da da da da  
  
Heero *laughs like he just blew something up*  
  
Trowa: ...  
  
Duo *singing* : I wasn't gonna run from the cops but I was high  
I was gonna pull right over and stop but I was high  
(La da da da da da da da da)  
Now I am a paraplegic and i know why (why man?) yea heayy  
cause I got high  
cause I got high  
cause I got high La da da da da da  
  
Quatre: hee-hee-hee-*screech*-hee-hee-hee-*screech*  
  
Wufei *stifling laughter*  
  
Duo *singing* : I was gonna pay my car note until I got high  
I was gonna gamble on the boat but then I got high  
now the tow truck is pulling away and I know why (why man?) yea heyy  
cause I got high  
cause I got high  
cause I got high La da da da da da  
  
Terrence *chuckling and lookin' fine (hey, stop lookin' at me like that)*  
  
Josh *smirking evilly (y'know, like Duo, or Fushigi Yugi's Suboshi)*  
  
Duo *singing* : I messed up my entire life because I got high  
I lost my kids and wife because I got high  
now I'm sleeping on the sidewalk and I know why (why man?) yea heyy  
cause I got high  
cause I got high  
cause I got high La da da da da da  
  
Drew *smirks evilly*  
  
Eddie *snickers*  
  
Heero: WHAT THE FUCK?!? KIDS AND WIFE?!? WHAT THE HELL?!?  
  
Drew: God, Heero, it's just a song!!! Like, get ov-ah it!!!  
  
Kris: Oh shit, the King of PMS has emerged!!!  
  
Drew: I detest that nickname!!!  
  
Duo *singing* : I'm gonna stop singing this song because I'm high  
I'm singing this whole thing wrong because I'm high  
and if I dont sell one copy I know why (why man?) yea heyy  
cause I got high  
cause I got high  
cause I got high  
la da da da da da, la da da, la da, la da da, la da da da, la da da da, la da da da da da, la da da da da da  
  
Kim, in crazed, homicidal mode, chucks a steak knife at Duo. He dodges it, but it cuts off an inch of his braid.  
  
Duo: UAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!  
  
Everyone except Duo *clutches their ears* : AAAH!!! MY EARS!!! AAAAAH!!!  
______________  
A/N: Damn, I hate Duo's ear-splitting scream!!! One more thing, I appreciate the song suggests, but me, Kim, Kris, Rave, Ashley (Ch.6) and Channing (Ch.11) came up with songs for everyone, sorry!!! 


End file.
